Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Hello, Nightmare. I'm Older Now, But You're Still Scary

When I was a kid, I used to have this one particular nightmare. Of course, I dreamed of monsters, demons, goblins, the world ending. Yeah… the world ending thing might not be your average fear for an eight-year-old, but TA-DA! I’ve always been crazy.

With all of that and the inevitable tears that accompanied terror, there was the dream that scared me more than all the others.

The dream:

I’m sitting in a room, and it slowly starts to spin. Then it goes faster… and faster… the room is spinning so fast it’s all a blur and I can’t stop it. I can’t stop it. It’s just going and going and nothing will STOP IT!

Until finally I wake up. But it was only after long minutes of yelling stop it, knowing that it’s NOT stopping. And it feels SO real.

I’m not sure when the spinning started. I finished the novel I used to submit this past year, Ruined, in December. Now it’s been a whole year. I’ve written three books since then. Ruined wasn’t my first manuscript, but it was the first one I had other people revise. It’s been writing, learning, revising, learning, plotting, revising, revising... The spinning has probably been faster at some times more than others.

But lately… it’s going really fast. I’m an adult now, right? So I can STOP.

I just need some time. Few days passed the last year when I wasn’t actively writing, revising, plotting. I’m going to go reacquaint myself with my couch and leave my computer alone. It’s very strange, but I have a feeling I need it.

Have you ever felt like you needed to stop the “spinning”? Please tell me it helped…


  1. My nightmares are more the 'everything stops' variety and I can't get moving again.


    Sounds like yours is more the carnival ride. Not great for equilibrium. I think you're on the right track. Take some time to get those feet back on the ground so you can figure out which way is which!

  2. Oh yeah, it does help! I hit a wall every once in a while, especially after a big deadline push. I just can't look at another computer screen. Usually, I plan to take a week or two away from writing. By day three or four, my batteries are recharged and I can think about getting back on the merry-go-round (the fast-spinning one!).

  3. Thanks for the comments Suzanne and Maureen! I woke up this morning plotting the next scene in my WIP. :-) Maybe I just needed to get it off my chest.

  4. I have nightmares, but they're usually after watching a scary movie. I never associated them with everyday life or writing. That's interesting take . . . one I'll consider in the future.

  5. Thanks for commenting, Darcy. I don't think I associated dreams and writing on purpose. It just kind of hit me in the face.

    I appreciate the free therapy, all :-)